Category: Uncategorized

closet-keys:

One thing I think is useful to conceptualize when thinking about the severity of depression is figuring out what counts as a ‘task’ to your brain

for example, healthy people outlining the tasks they need to do that day might be something like 

– class
– work
– homework

if a healthy person is having a low energy day, maybe it becomes 

– make breakfast
– go to class
– class
– go to work
– work
– come home from work
– work on an essay
– do 2 readings 

a depressed person, on a high energy day will probably see that same day as 

– make breakfast
– eat breakfast
– take meds
– shower
– get dressed
– walk to bus
– take bus
… etc

a depressed person, on a low energy day will see that same day as

– wake up
– get out of bed
– walk to bathroom
– use bathroom
– stand back up
– walk to kitchen
– open fridge
– take out juice
– set on counter
– go to cabinet
– reach up arm
– take down glass
– unscrew lid of juice carton
– pour juice
– drink the juice
– finish the juice
…etc

the sort of chronic exhaustion manifests in how each ‘task’ takes a certain amount of energy and when you have depression, what begins to take that amount of energy- and thus, cognitively count as a ‘task’- are smaller and smaller subdivisions of what other people consider tasks. 

And the more ‘tasks’ you do, the less energy you have, and the smaller the subdivisions must be to take equivalent amounts of energy. And the longer that “to do” list of tasks is, the more exhausting and overwhelming and hopeless it feels, which creates a feedback loop of dysfunction.

So say our depressed person on a low energy day gets all the way to finishing their glass of juice. They’ve actually gotten through a lot of tasks! They’ve tried really hard. 

But to a healthy person, even on a low energy day, that probably looks like not having done anything- not having gotten through any tasks. And when our depressed person is surrounded by healthy people, they will likely internalize that they haven’t done anything, and further that they can’t complete any tasks no matter how hard they try. And that feeds worthlessness and suicidal ideation 

That, I think, is why it’s so important to encourage your depressed and chronically low-energy friends when they accomplish tasks, even if they’re operating at a level of subdivision that you don’t recognize. It is an accomplishment to get water and actually drink it for some folks. It is an accomplishment to get to class or to work. 

And acknowledging how hard someone is trying and how much energy they’re putting towards accomplishing those tasks can make a huge difference in whether they feel worthless and hopeless or whether they feel like it’s worth it to keep doing what they can.

birdthany:

andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

Now that I’m studying bio, may I just say how fervently I wish my primary association with the words “alpha, beta, omega” was literally anything other than what it is

My nutrition professor was talking about vitamins and said, “the only reason you all even know the words alpha and omega is because of sororities,” and I wanted so badly to raise my hand and be like “if you’re gonna be a dick for some reason, please let me explain to you in depth my immediate connotations for those words”

I’m in training to become a phlebotomist and at my last class we did blood typing and let me tell you when I walked into the lab to see A/B/O written in massive letters on the whiteboard I felt six years come off my lifespan

soyeahso:

“There comes a time when refusing to stop violence can no longer be called nonviolence. We cease to be objectors and become bystanders. At some point, morality must be wedded to action, or else it’s no more than mere…vanity.”

— Leia: Princess of Alderaan, by Claudia Gray (via swnovels)

silver-boots:

steadfast:

vampireapologist:

You all, fools: *getting tattoos based on the ancient tattoos they find on bog mummies and the other ancient dead that for all you know will bind you to a forgotten god that now by all rights has a claim on your life for better or for worse*

Me, and intellectual: *doesnt fucking do that*

A forgotten god cannot run my life any worse than I am currently running it myself.

Bog mummy take the wheel