they managed to have a secret baby just hanging out together in the desert for a year like how fast did they move and how many times because holy shit. yes. he’d absolutely be the oldest brother of 12 half alien kids.
god… au where that happens and it’s some kind of jane austen-esque thing with shiro trying to court the quiet eldest brother of a huge giant beautiful alien family that all wants him dead on sight for looking at keith… heath is the only one on his side…
*hand immediately shoots in the air* I WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THE SPACE GIRLFRIENDS
Space girlfriends are the best girlfriends that’s just science.
Here’s a rough outline because I still haven’t figured out all the plot but Steela is back on Onderon where she’s desperately trying to avoid being chosen as the new senator (Lux is super dead in this) when word arrives that Ahsoka is on trial for treason and murder.
That is ridiculous, she tells Saw, who had the bad luck to be the messenger. Get me the king. I won’t stand for this.
Steela may not completely understand politics but she’s going to figure it out quickly.
Ahsoka is exonerated and leaves the Order, and she is alone. Or she thinks she is right up until Saw turns up on Coruscant to take her back to Onderon.
You always have a place with us, Saw says, as gentle as he knows how because Ahsoka looks almost small, stripped of her lightsabers and padawan beads.
Thank you, Ahsoka says, and then quietly, more to herself than him, I don’t have a home.
About that, Saw says, and tosses her a data pad. Steela’s got it all worked out.
It’s citizenship papers. Ahsoka is a citizen of Onderon.
How? Ahsoka asks, eyes wide.
Saw shrugged. She freed our people. They’ll give her anything she wants, and what she wants is for you to come home.
Steela is waiting for them when they land, and Ahsoka only has enough time to raise her hand her greeting before Steela is embracing her, hand steady and warm between Ahsoka’s shoulder blades.
I know we can’t replace what you lost, Steela says, but this can be your home too, if you want.
It takes Ahsoka a long time to reply, clinging as she is to Steela, but she says, Thank you, and means it.
Congratulations, I’m CACKLING at this. Omg, the only way this could be better is if a ghost pops up and Nightingale has to deal with it and tour-guide!Peter is VERY suspicious/intrigued.
I’ll go you one better: it turns out that Nightingale is in fact the embodiment of that post about immortals who weren’t really paying attention to major historical events and the fact he corrected Peter on is the one thing he knows that Peter doesn’t.
Peter spends the next few months trying to interrogate him on various things and being told that Nightingale a) was in Sri Lanka b) remembers things but not the thing Peter wants to know and/or c) just wasn’t paying attention. Peter is only slightly mollified by being introduced to some of the older Rivers, because half of them weren’t paying attention either, especially to things that didn’t affect local hydrology.
(I am 90% sure this is true in actual canon but it’s even funnier if knowing historical facts about London is Peter’s job and not just his hobby)
Congratulations, I’m CACKLING at this. Omg, the only way this could be better is if a ghost pops up and Nightingale has to deal with it and tour-guide!Peter is VERY suspicious/intrigued.
ed literally CAN NOT deal with his brother stuck in a suit of armor for years and years it hurts him more than losing his limbs and automail ever could. he wishes over and over again that he could give his body to al – then he goes LIGHTBULB and so during that year that he’s recovering he studies and studies and they all think it’s to get al’s body back but not quite.
and like 6 months in he’s like okay i think ive figured it out and he can kinda stand and walk around and what not so he’s like al cmere im going to try something. they’re all like ????? and ed tugs down his pants and on his hip is a scar. a very familiar, precise scar. ed had carved al’s seal into his flesh then let it heal and done it again again until it had scarred just like he’d wanted it to. winry screams and threatens to strangle him and ed is like ‘pls stop’ and al gets it then and if he could cry he would and he asks ed over and over again if he’s sure and ed just tells him to shut up, claps his hands together and presses them to al’s seal
then next thing he knows he’s staring down at himself and the first thing he says is “i am short” and is immediately horrified and the first thing al does is throw himself down on the ground to feel grass between his fingers and hugs winry to feel skin and now he is crying because he can
and so this is how they survive this, by sharing ed’s body between them. ed tried to say it should be 50/50 but al refused so ed is in his own body for 2 weeks then al is in it for 1 week and they don’t tell anyone because they’re not insane. and when ed’s sleeping weird places or eating a ton it’s actually usually al. their wildly different personalities would be a problem, except that they’re still children and like twins who switch places they get a giant kick out of it. al loves pretending to be loud and angry and having a fly away temper and it’s all ed can do to go chasing after al shouting ‘brother!’ trying to act disapproving but inside he is laughing so damn much
there’s no negative effects, nothing goes wrong. they don’t knows this, but it’s actually helping, because their souls gain a stronger connection and ed’s body spends a whole lot more time sleeping and eating then it would otherwise so al’s body is actually getting a reasonable-ish about of nutrients and sleep behind the gate. also every time ed switches their souls it’s like he’s renewing the seal so al’s soul never gets loose and isn’t going to be rejected form the armor.
then al remembers the gate and can do hands free alchemy, which is awesome, because now they can go into battle in each other’s bodies when before they always needed to hastily switch back otherwise people would start asking questions. it becomes something so easy and natural between them, and more than once ed’s been up late studying with his eyelids drooping, exhausted past the point of reason but unwilling to stop. and he just goes ‘al, come here, sleep for me so i can finish this book’ an al loves sleeping so he’s like ‘fuck yeah’
al doesn’t need to make a list of things to eat and experiences to do because he gets to experience them all, it’s just you know, keeping up a timeshare of his brother’s body isn’t realistic and he’d really like his own back, thanks.
and they don’t have secrets, obviously, can’t when they spend half the time running around in the other’s body. except ed kind of develops a crush on mustang and roy’s confused with all these mixed signals?? because sometimes ed looks at him like he wants to eat him and other times there’s nothing???? but one day ed says screw this and he and roy end up making out and all that and kinda sort of start a relationship ish and ed means to tell al, he does, he just can’t bring himself too. so it’s 2 weeks of dating roy and he switches their bodies, and still hasn’t told him. they’re spending the day away from base so ed doesn’t worry about it, is like okay, i’ll tell al tomorrow this is not a big deal i can handle this
except they’re, i don’t know, in the market or the library or something and roy sees ed is and internally like ed! ededed! ❤ ❤ ❤ but he has to pretend to be cool so he corners ed and kisses him and is shocked and hurt when ed pushes him away and ed just stares at him for a long moment before howling “oh my GOD you and brother are DATING?”
and they don’t call roy a genius for nothing so he’s like “…. alphonse?” and ed goes really pale and and then al’s armour rounds the corner like ‘brother! what’s wrong i heard you yell – “ and he sees them and goes “oh shit” and roy is like “EDWARD???”
and it’s like fuck, after about 5 years of playing this game they’ve been caught. and so roy drags them back to the office and everyone gathers’ round while they explain and eds like ‘you should have just gone along with it al, jeez’
‘gone along with it?’ al in ed’s body screams, ‘the COLONEL KISSED ME’ and then he goes kinda pale and whispers ‘my first kiss was the colonel so unfair i don’t even like boys’
and havoc, breda, and maes take this opportunity to excuse themselves so they can die laughing in the hallway while ed and roy look kinda embarassed and riza just. regrets everything. why is this idiotic pyromaniac her best friend again???
and things settle down and continue on and roy is very, very careful about who’s in ed’s body when in the future. and al eventually gets his body back and it’s not sickly and dying its just kind of underfed, so this isn’t too bad. and the very first thing he does is tacklE winry to the ground and they lock themselves in her room for like four hours because timeshare of ed’s body or not none of them had felt comfortable with them having sex with al in his body, and winry even had to close her eyes when they’d kissed.
and their souls have mingled so much that al and ed are almost telepathic with each other which they think is the coolsest thing ever and literally everyone else despises because they only abuse their new powers to be brats, because that’s what the do, obviously
It’s time for another round of aus I would like to read but not necessarily write because my wip list is a nightmare that never ends: clone wars ds9 au.
And let’s be honest the main reason I want this is because the Jedi are obviously the Trill, and Hondo’s people are exceptionally long lived and he has known several of Kenobi’s previous hosts. He is, as he will loudly tell anyone within shouting distant, Kenobi’s best friend. He’s not exactly wrong.
(Obi-Wan had barely set foot onto the promenade before he was greeted with a booming “Kenobi!”
Hondo bustled out of his bar, grinning, arms held wide open.
“Hello, Hondo,” Obi-Wan said, resigned, as Hondo swept him into an embrace that lifted him off his feet.
“You’ve changed faces again, old friend,” Hondo set, setting Obi-Wan back onto his feet. “You’ve finally become a ginger. I like the beard. Very masculine. Oh, remembers Ilia’s lamentations over xir inability to grow one?”
“I’ve always liked a good beard,” Obi-Wan said.
He had long since given up on guessing how Hondo always knew it was him, even when he was in a new host. He half-suspected Hondo just shouted that greeting at every passing Trill in hopes of eventually getting it right.
“You wound me,” Hondo had said the one time Jrul Kenobi had voiced her theory, hand splayed over his heart. “I am wounded to my very core that you think our deep and abiding friendship means so little I would not recognize you.”
“You once mistook Jinn for me,” Kenobi pointed out dryly, although out of all of Kenobi’s hosts she was the one who found Hondo the most amusing.
Hondo waved one hand dismissively. “Bah. I was drunk and concussed. You cannot possibly blame me for that. And,” Hondo added as he topped up Kenobi’s glass with fine Vulcan whiskey, “you have a very particular way of carrying yourself. You cannot be mistaken for anyone but yourself.”
“Why, Hondo, that was very nearly poetic of you,” Kenobi said, and touched their glasses together.
“Tell me, my friend,” Hondo said, draping an arm around Obi-Wan’s shoulders, “now that you’ve finally grown the beard you’ve always wanted, have you put more thought towards my very lucrative business opportunity?”
“It’s piracy,” Obi-Wan said dryly, “and my answer is still no.”
Hondo shrugged, unbothered as always. “Perhaps your next host will have a better head for business.” He steered Obi-Wan towards his bar. “I hear you’ve got a little worm junior falling you around. You should bring him around sometime. It is a him, yes? There is so much I want to tell him.”
The Trill were not gifted with foresight, but Obi-Wan had a vivid vision of Anakin and Hondo meeting.
“That,” he said with feeling, “will never happen.”)
ooh ooh! what if the cardassians got it into their heads to clone an army of bioengineered bajoran soldiers for the sole purpose of using the clones to root out and kill bajoran resistance fighters. only it backfired spectacularly and a bunch of the cloned bajorans helped beat back the cardassians, only now the bajorans are arguing whether or not the clones count as people, and the cardassians are claiming the clones are property and should be returned to cardassia. Queue the arrival of the federation,
ok here’s a hot take: modern adaptations of pride and prejudice should replace Mrs Bennet’s obsession w/ marrying her daughters off with a determination to see them all be lawyers/doctors/engineers in their own right, and her frustration with Lizzie for refusing Mr Collins should be because she turned down the opportunity to have a lucrative and successful career in order to do what she wants, which is, like, journalism or something
Like it doesn’t help the plot in the same way but within context Mrs B’s motivations can be boiled down to “make sure all my daughters are taken care of and going to be comfortable in their lives” which, back in the day, meant marrying well, but nowadays would look more like a full ride to an Ivy League, and rather than being disinterested in their romantic endeavors Mr Bennet should be completely blase about Lydia and Kitty giving each other stick-n-poke tattoos and failing Spanish and getting arrested. Elizabeth tries and fails to talk him out of letting Lydia go to “leadership camp,” a lie she told her mother to cover up the fact that she’s definitely tagging along with some college kids to Mexico for spring break. Jane is in med school and Mrs B prays every night that she comes to her senses and decides to be a neurosurgeon instead of doing doctors without borders. Lizzie tells her mother she’s majoring in women’s studies over text message and ignores 16 furious voicemails in response, partially cause she doesn’t want to hear it and partially because she’s arguing with Darcy, whose first name she refuses to know because he’s too rich to deserve one, in her opinion. So, yeah, soccer mom Mrs Bennet.
tora42's nonsensne 