I had a dream last night that Queer Eye went to Starkiller Base and like 90% of it was just Jonathan frantically smearing greenstick on Snoke’s caved-in fucking face and trying to be like “LOOK HONEY THAT LOOKS BETTER RIGHT?” And then Antoni found the bowl of human ashes a la the bag of human teeth and he was like “I need to leave right now bye.”
Plot twist they join the Resistance and appoint themselves Morale Officers. Anyway the Resistance has Cute Boys Who Are Not Violent Racists, and Jonathan has been barred from Leia’s presence because all he can ever manage to say is “YAS QUEEN” around her and then try to touch her hair
Tan spends like two days with Snap helping him feel sexy and confident to dress for his body type. He really thinks that if anyone could carry on the Lando Calrissian Cape Closet tradition, it’s Snap. Snap cries and gifts him his very own reprogrammed bloodthirsty battledroid.
“Rose, why is it so hard for you to see yourself as a hero, too?” Karamo asks. He holds both of her hands very tenderly and makes her say ten things she’s done to help the Resistance. Then he takes her space square dancing on Mon Cala, for some reason, because confidence or something.
Jonathan is brought to tears of joy by Poe’s haircare regimen. “YES, MOISTURIZER! YES, VOLUME! YES, DEFINED CURLS!” He goes through all of Beebee’s compartments and pulls out bottle after bottle of sunscreen and beard oil and cuticle nippers and sobs.
“This is a really interesting space,” Bobby says of the Falcon. “It’s got great old bones, and I want to show those off, not cover them up. But whoever put in a wet bar back in the ‘70s, honey, no. Let’s update that.”
“A great thing to make for the 19 friends trapped on a single Corellian
YT light-freighter with you is space guacamole,” Antoni tells Finn.
Porgs steal all of the space tortilla chips.
ACTUAL NATIVE ACTORS PLAYING ACTUAL NATIVE CHARACTERS?
WHO KNEW YOU COULD DO THAT
It’s on Hulu now. As time goes on, there’s more and more characters of color, more and more queer characters, and more and more of a good time had by all. Especially notable are the native characters, because I don’t think native & indigenous Canadians get much rep.
sometimes i’m tempted to start a recipe blog, but then i remember that i’d basically be the ron swanson of bloggers:
no one cares about your pretending-to-be-charming-but-actually-annoying-personal-stories
oh, you saw a leaf today? whoop de fucking do. i can go outside and see as many leaves as i want. why the hell do you think that’s relevant to this recipe???
i don’t care about your kids. there. i said it. someone had to
here’s the recipe. make it or don’t, i couldn’t give a shit
but if you do make, fucking follow it. margarine is bullshit. skim milk is bullshit. imitation vanilla extract is bullshit. get yourself down to the store and buy butter, whole milk, and real vanilla extract. your taste buds will thank you
there’s never a reason to buy buttermilk if you only need a cup. just take 8 oz of that whole milk and add a tablespoon of white vinegar
set a timer, but don’t trust it. timers lie. keep an eye on your oven, son
if you’re feeding other people, believe them if they say that have allergies. don’t be an asshole
I think we, as a general community, need to start taking this little moment more seriously.
This, right here? This is asking for consent. It’s a legal necessity, yes, but it is also you, the reader, actively consenting to see adult content; and in doing so, saying that you are of an age to see it, and that you’re emotionally capable of handling it.
You find the content you find behind this warning disgusting, horrifying, upsetting, triggering? You consented. You said you could handle it, and you were able to back out at any time. You take responsibility for yourself when you click through this, and so long as the creator used warnings and tags correctly, you bear full responsibility for its impact on you.
“Children are going to lie about their age” is probably true, but that’s the problem of them and the people who are responsible for them, not the people that they lie to.
If you’re not prepared to see adult content, created by and for adults, don’t fucking click through this. And if you do, for all that’s holy, don’t blame anyone else for it.
tora42's nonsensne 