Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?
i do bite my thumb, sir
Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?
is the law on our side if i say ay?
No
no, sir, i do not bite my thumb at you sir; but I bite my thumb, sir
Do you quarrel, sir?
quarrel, sir? no sir
if you do, sir, i am for you: i serve as good a man as you
No better
well, sir
DOST THOU WANT TO FUCKING GO, SIR?
DOST THOU THINK THOU CAN FUCKING TAKE ME, BRO?
DOST THOU EVEN HOIST? OUT TO THE COURT YARD, WITH HASTE.
Author: tora42
Did Roy ever find his boyfriend?
he did
happy for him
YOU FORGOT THE BEST PART
THEY ADOPTED A DAUGHTER NAMED TANGO BECAUSE IT TAKES 2 TO TANGO!!!!
This is them:
and they even had a book written about them:
guys Tango found a girlfriend :’)
This is gay lesbian solidarity
I hate when people call randomly… like if you’re not the love of my life or my mother, please text to schedule an appointment first.
me: *performs a basic function of an adult human in society*
me: I am so on top of it today

A gif for Mermay!
This gif actually, literally made me laugh out loud and send it to every group chat I’m in just to get yelled at. Thank you.
I checked the notes looking for these exact frames and was not disappointed.

THE LIBRARY OF UNWRITTEN BOOKS // a short story about how to steal a tome from the library of unwritten books
PS: My new book of stories is out at http://shorteststory.com/book




















