gyzym:

other-romantic-verbs:

monsterau:

i didn’t expect to come out of leverage with so many emotions about the fucking brewpub??? what has this show DONE to me

but ok. like. the brewpub doesn’t turn a profit, right. it is actively losing money all of the time, but it doesn’t matter? because of their fucking alternative revenue stream, they don’t NEED to make a profit, they literally own this brewpub for the fun of it

so, like. they COULD make it turn a profit but: eliot & hardison, working-class boys TM, they are absolutely going to:

• make everything on the menu $0.50 less than it costs to make at least, because affordable food is important

• just fucking give away shit for free. oh you can’t pay for this food? that’s fine don’t worry about it have it anyway, also would you like a coffee? some beer?

• get everything locally, pay a LOT for it (let’s take a moment for all of the feelings eliot ‘grew up in a farming town’ spencer 100% has about corporations paying farmers the bare fucking minimum they can get away with. so many feelings, he goes on long & impassioned rants whenever this comes up, my bitter socialist son)

• pay all of their staff like three times minimum wage at the least

• all of the staff have AMAZING insurance & they always pay out if they need to

• if any of the staff mention anything health related hardison will appear & offer to pay for it

• if any of the CUSTOMERS mention anything health related hardison will appear & offer to pay for it

• (i REFUSE to accept that hardison doesn’t tip, that is WRONG, the show is WRONG & i will NOT allow it, hardison tips. hardison’s elder siblings were waitstaff who depended on tips to make rent, hardison tips generously. hardison has all this money & he’s not even using most of it so he gives it away All Of The Time)

like. LIKE. the brewpub is basically a fucking nonprofit charity, they run jobs to take down capitalist scum & then come home to their aggressively socialist brewpub, this is just. this is fact. you cannot convince me this isn’t true

Yes yes yesss all the brew pub stuff is sooooo cute.  Plus I’ve had this rant about the tipping thing in my drafts for months and finally have an excuse to vent a little bit:

*CRACKS KNUCKLES*  Okay, here we go. Alec Hardison would not be a bad
tipper!!!!!!  Hardison is IMO the most morally good person on the team,
he is able to empathize so well with people.  I mean he’s the heart in
the head/heart/fist trio, not to mention the fact that he grew up in
foster care so he knows what it’s like to just scrape by.  And he’s not
been shown being stingy with money at all previously (he buys apartment
buildings and Ferraris all willy-nilly).  It would be far more
believable if Hardison tipped that delivery guy a huge tip and then he
and Eliot bickered about tipping too much (half-heartedly b/c Eliot’s not a douchebag either), not the other way around.   

And if you listen to the commentary, Rogers basically says that the
argument was one that they have in the writer’s room a lot and they just
threw it into the show.  Grrr, don’t just throw things into the show
that make my baby hacker seem like an asshole, thanks. 

P.S. I still love
the show and think it has near-perfect characterization, this has just
always bothered me. 

a) I AGREE SO MUCH WITH EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS POST AND 

b) in order to make that horrible not-tipping scene (hardison WOULD NEVER) gel with my personal view of hardison (aka someone who WOULD NEVER), i have developed the following headcanon: that particular delivery guy and hardison have a Longstanding Bitter Hatred for one another. like, maybe he was the person who always showed up with all the crap hardison was ordering for the leverage office back when he and parker first got to portland and bought the brewpub, and at first hardison was perfectly nice to him and tipped him generously, as he ALWAYS DOES WITH EVERY OTHER PERSON HE ENCOUNTERS WHO IT IS ACCEPTABLE TO TIP (and even some, lbr, who he isn’t actually supposed to tip, but tips anyway). but then the guy started making comments, you know, about all the stuff hardison was ordering, and isn’t this a weird amount of technological crap for the back room of a restaurant, and hey, man, be straight with me: are you some kind of government spy, or are you just a HUGE nerd? and at first hardison was like ha ha, some curiosity from the delivery dude, no big, camaraderie with the locals is very important, so what if he called me a nerd, i am a nerd! age of the geek, baby. i am fine with this. this is fine. except then he noticed that sometimes, his packages looked a little battered, like maybe somebody had taken a look-see inside, and delivery guy always seemed to know WHAT he’d ordered, and so it was that a little kernel of suspicion began to grow inside of him. YOU KNOW IT’S A FEDERAL OFFENSE TO OPEN SOMEONE ELSE’S MAIL, said hardison to the delivery guy the next time they saw each other, and the delivery guy was all, i don’t know what you’re taking about, sir, i just deliver the packages, sir, but – as hardison said to parker later, in what anyone else would call a rant and alec would insist was simply a reasonable airing of suspicions – he was SHIFTY-EYED ABOUT IT. SHIFTY-EYED AND HIDING SOMETHING, PARKER!! and when parker shrugged and was like, whatever, he’s a nice enough guy now that he’s stopped hitting on me, delivery guy’s fate was sealed, and his name was forever written in the Alec Hardison Book of Hate. (although really there’s not very many people in the book; it’s more like the Alec Hardison Very Large Post-It of Hate. or, let’s be honest, the Alec Hardison .rtf of Hate, since it’s not like he really believes in using paper.)

point being, then there was a whole thing where alec called the delivery company and tried to get someone else assigned to them, but that didn’t happen because delivery routes and ‘honestly sir he’s one of our best employees i’m sure he’s not opening your mail,’ and ‘really sir the more you call the more this sounds like a personal grudge of some kind, the best thing for all of us would be if you just… stopped calling.’ and then the delivery dude found OUT about hardison calling his bosses, so now they are Enemies, and that is why alec’s all I WILL TIP YOU IN CHANGE IF I TIP YOU AT ALL and WHY WOULD I GIVE HIM A TIP FOR DOING HIS JOB and that nasty little BUY YOUR MOMMA SOMETHING NICE, because, you know. they’re Enemies. this is how Enemies behave! (relatedly, alec is not really very good at being Enemies; his skills lie mostly in being Friends.) and obviously he has ranted about this at length to eliot and parker and sophie and nate and everyone he knows, hence their pointed insistence that he give the guy a tip, because all of them a) think the whole thing is a little nuts and b) really, really want them to bury the hatchet so they don’t have to hear about it anymore. BUT HARDISON WILL NEVER BURY THE HATCHET. ALEC’S GOOD OPINION ONCE LOST IS LOST FOREVER. and there you have it. a fix to the horrible tipping scene! thank you and good night.